with Lynne and Leslie
Tag Archives: Home

Five Minute Friday: Visiting home, and having home visit

by SweetMidlife

I no longer feel like a visitor in my own home.

Leslie here! Our word for the day is “Visit.” Here goes!


I am a transplant in South Florida, a place that is often said to have no natives, which is dumb and arrogant on the part of the transplants, because somebody’s getting born in those hospitals. Anyway, I’m often asked “Where are you from?” with the assumption that I am originally from somewhere else. And I am a native Baltimorean by way of Pennsylvania. For years that was my identity, to the point where even though my mail was delivered here, I still referred to Baltimore as “home,” though I hadn’t lived there since 1992. I felt lighter there, more comfortable. I felt like I was at home on my visits, and visiting in Florida, which was technically my home.

But a funny thing happened about five years ago – I fell in love with a man who was from home, from my high school, who also felt like a visitor in the state where he’d lived off and on for a decade. But we found more than a person to kiss and share a mortgage with. We found our home. And suddenly, this place where we were living felt like home. Our friends and family were secretly hoping that, having fallen in love, we would move back to Maryland and finally be home. The weird thing was – we each fell in love with a Baltimorean and finally felt like Floridians. We were no longer visiting in this space. We belonged.

I still don’t get how Floridians drive. But I guess I am one now, no longer a visitor in my home. So it’s sort of OK.


Halfway done + Partially Finished + Touching it Up = Completed

by SweetMidlife

Ahh Mondays.  Yes, the weekend is over, but Mondays for me mean beginnings. Another chance to get things right. To start Weight Watchers anew. To dig into my workout plans. And to tackle our house chore list.

In our effort to manage the upkeep of our house, along with managing the baby who lives here, my husband’s fulltime job, my PT freelance teaching gigs and during the day management of the aforementioned baby, we found a template online for splitting household chores (It’s from a cool site called Apartment Therapy). It’s a really good tool: it divides all of the things that need to be done by day between the two of us, and we have edited the template’s suggestions according to what needs to be done in our own home. So it’s up on the refrigerator, all color-coded and ready to go. Below is a picture of the template.

Now we just have to DO the things on the list.

What happens often is that we start so well, with both of us completing our Monday chores actually ON Monday. But sometimes you only get to clean half of the bathroom on Wednesday . Or you straighten the living room, but don’t have time to Swiffer the ceiling fans before your meeting.  And by Thursday, you are still stuck on Tuesday’s duties, and the list that was supposed to help you is now mocking you from the fridge door.

Don’t let it! Because your house isn’t going anywhere. You still have a chance to get stuff done, even if it isn’t as quickly or as timely as you wanted it. Don’t cede your house to crud, but don’t get obsessed with it either. I am learning to use the chore sheet as a guide. Not as a Bible, but also not as just another pretty picture hanging on the freezer. But as a place to start. To intend to stick to it. To PLAN to stick to it. But getting it done. Even if it is on a different day. Done is done. No matter when.

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