with Lynne and Leslie

Do’s, Don’t’s, and yoga pants: Sometimes you gotta

by SweetMidlife

Leslie here!

It’s been a while since you’ve heard from me in these parts, as we’ve had visitors, a shared family cough we’ve been passing around like the worst gift you never wanted, and just a lot of stressful stressful siss boom ba. Lynne’s been holding down the fort beautifully, but if you’ve missed me, that’s what I’ve been up to.

And also yoga pants.

I am a 43-year-old former hardcore runner, boot camper and all around gym rat. That iteration of myself came within the last decade, starting in my early 30s. I was never the fastest or fittest chick in the place. But what I lacked in mastery I more than made up for in consistency, until my aging body, which had been warning me to slow down with some aches, pains and strains, finally decided I couldn’t take a hint and just started sputtering. The knees ached. The shoulder ached. The sciatica in the hip developed. (That sounds like something Fred Sanford had, right?)

So I had no choice but to slow way, way down. Somewhere in there I started looking for something active that would help my back, and settled on yoga, something I used to do all the time but gave up because there was only time after a while for the pounding, hard core exercise. Dummy. I went to several classes at the gym I belong to, and then bought a two-week membership at a local warm yoga studio, which was pricey but wonderful.

I decided if I was going to restart my practice, as creaky and blocky as I was, I needed to look the part, which meant going to the local Beall’s outlet and picking up two pairs of yoga pants. These are not Lululemon pants, because they are expensive and the owners of that company don’t apparently want my fat butt in them. These are more like Lololimeade. But they’re roomy where they should be and make my hindparts region look and feel better than it should (because cheese.)

Before I ever bought a pair I had read all sorts of fashion blogs that poo-poo the wearing of yoga pants anywhere outside of a yoga class, because they’re workout gear and everyone knows that wearing them out means you’re lazy. But I’ma tell you what – I am guilty. GUILTY. Because last week, when the young lady that sometimes cleans our house was here, I had to run to the bank, and was wearing said yoga pants around the house. I thought “I could change into gym shorts or something because I’ve not yet showered and don’t want to waste cute clothing on a dirty body, or I could just leave.”

And I left. And the seas did not boil over in a sartorial rage, nor did birds plummet from the skies, not did Tim Gunn jump out the bushes at the Wells Fargo to pants shame me. Maybe I got looks. I dunno. I was just trying to get some money out the bank. I am a somewhat public person where I live so I thought for a minute that I might be seen and judged by someone who knows me. And then I felt the sweet supportive hug of the yoga pants, whispering ‘You are good enough. You look fine. You don’t smell. And no one expects you to be Heidi Klum anyway.”

It’s now Saturday and I write you from the south Florida headquarters of Sweet Midlife LLC. And I am wearing yoga pants (not the same ones. The other ones.) Already I have run errands out of the house, including to get breakfast. And you know what? I don’t care. I would not wear them to work. I would not wear them to dinner. I might wear them on a quick run to Publix (OK, I did that yesterday. But I wore a nice shirt).

I understand rules and appropriateness. I also understand a bunch of people with more money and more assistants than I have (I don’t have an assistant, FYI) in New York ladling out edicts and rules to shame women into watching their every move in fear of breaking some fashion law (and so they’ll buy more stuff.) I’m not having it. I will look great when I need to. But when I’m running around it’s me and the yoga pants.

I might even wear them to yoga.

10 Responses to “Do’s, Don’t’s, and yoga pants: Sometimes you gotta”

  1. kristen_mom@yahoo.com' Kristen says:

    YES, AMEN SISTER!! Comfort, modesty, and confidence in a pair of pants — run the errands and be free!!

    The girl who has never taken a yoga class but LOVES her pants…now feeling less shame to admit that!

  2. bride35 says:

    They’re the best. I am going to go over to the outlet and get two more pairs today, because with a T-shirt over it, who knows what you’re wearing. And they’re not the Lululemon butt-baring ones, anyway.

  3. tangodiva@bellsouth.net' Tanya says:

    Which Beall’s Outlet? I need some new pants.

  4. Lesliegraystreeter@gmail.com' Leslie says:

    Dixie south of Forest Hill, next to Planet Fitness.

  5. bride35 says:

    Rest assured, these are the ones that flair out and go all the way to the floor, not the butt-showing see-through ones.

  6. mariasimplysmiling@gmail.com' Maria says:

    Haha that last line killed me! Loved this!

  7. […] both been posting a lot about the exercise/eating habit/losing flabby/getting it together thing. Here, and here, for […]

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